Rex

Rex knows how to surf. Rex can cook Baked Alaska. Rex bench-presses twice his own weight. Rex got the skillz. Rex is nice to your parents. Rex can parallel park. Rex knows a lettuce from a cabbage. Rex can disassemble and reassemble a rifle in the dark. Rex knows most of Shakespeare's sonnets by heart. Rex can do the tango and the Charleston. Rex wears orange and aqua, and they look good on him. Rex speaks Italian. Rex doesn't care if you're rich or poor. Rex always sends a card on your birthday. Rex knows how to deal with lawyers. Rex can see stereograms. Rex owns a "fish tie", but scorns hats that hold beer cans. Rex doesn't smoke. Rex says "please" and "thank you". Rex likes saag paneer. Rex is a member of the ACLU. Rex thinks you look good in that outfit.

Rex is the king, baby.